keeping a positive mindset

Good morning, everyone! Happy Sunday - Hope your morning is filled with banana pancakes, mugs full of coffee, and coziness in general. (I now realize that it's Monday when I am actually finishing this post... whoops! Still - hope your Sunday was just lovely.)

I've been thinking a lot lately about what it means to be "positive" or have good energy. Though I wish we could all be happy all of the time, it's impossible. Happiness is a great and wonderful emotion, but it's not a permanent state of mind - some days are going to bring a crap-storm of destruction and frustration or sadness, making it hard to stay happy all the time. There is a distinct difference between feeling happy and keeping a positive mindset - keeping  positive mindset is more of a change in lifestyle. It helps you persevere through the times that are just plain old unhappy and come out on top, still fighting for yourself. It keeps you calm and peaceful through crazy times and unsettling periods in life. It's really hard and you will probably not be able to always keep a fully positive mindset, but part of having that sort of mindset is realizing that you aren't perfect, and you can't expect yourself to be happy-go-lucky and filled with rainbows all the time.

I wanted to write out some ideas and tips for how I slowly am able to reframe my mindset when I'm feeling negative and discouraged.

1. Pay attention to who/what you surround yourself with. Who do you spend the most time with? What accounts are you following on Instagram? Is your home a comfortable and clean place to live? Some changes you can make are quick, and some take time to slowly adjust. Go through your Facebook friends and who you're following on Instagram once every few months, and clean it out. Whether it's an account that is constantly posting negative things, or someone you often compare yourself to, just keep it fun and positive. I love following my friends and family, other mom bloggers who inspire me, and funny accounts or inspirational photos. If your space (your home, apartment, car, cubicle, etc.) needs a good clean, do it! Simplify, get rid of old things you don't use, put pieces that make you smile around you - whether it's a new piece you're hanging on your wall to an air freshener in your car, do little things to make you appreciate your space more. Lastly - and this may take a long time and is tougher - think long and hard about who you're spending your time with. If someone close to you is always negative and tears themselves down or judges others, think about what all of that negativity is filling your head with! No, I'm not saying to dump everyone from your life who might complain or be sad sometimes - I'm talking about people who don't make you feel good, or who make you feel like crap or like you're not being your best. Distance yourself for a bit, and see how it feels. 
2. Let yourself be excited about things, but keep your expectations reasonable. If you expect everything in your life to go smoothly and perfectly, you will be disappointed often. I love being excited and planning for big events in my life, but I always try to remember to be realistic - nothing will go perfectly. One example is a bride who is determined to have every single thing go absolutely perfect on her wedding day, and the moment one thing goes wrong, the whole day is ruined. Especially if you have children - no matter what the occasion - things will probably not go according to plan 100% of the time. Let yourself ebb and flow with what happens, and stay calm. For instance, if you have a big plan to do a full shopping day with your toddler and they immediately begin throwing tantrums like wild man, it can be very easy to get worked up and frustrated. Take a deeeeeeep breath and be flexible - maybe letting them nap in the car or play at the playground first will be in both of your best interest. 
3. Work on new projects. I really love always having a project on my plate. Even if it takes me months to finally get around to working on it, it's nice to feel like you've accomplished something and made something yourself. I am currently working on re-selling my favorite thrift store finds, restoring an old beat up shelf system, and I always have blog or my jewelry-making or painting to turn to if I have a little downtime or am feeling like I need to do something creative. I'd love to practice embroidery or weaving someday as well. Whether you enjoy doing creative things, sporty activities, or something completely different (kite flying! lotion making! The possibilities are endless!), have something to do that inspires you and takes a little time to learn.
4. What you release, you attract. This has been echoing through my mind a lot - a few weeks ago, I was feeling frustrated and worried about all sorts of things in our life, and Chris and I sat down and talked and he gave me a reality check - if I only see the negative, there will ONLY be negative! No matter all the times Ben laughs every day, or the moments where Chris and I have a hug in the middle of the day, or all the times we get to watch the sunset - nothing will seem impressive if I'm constantly feeling negative. It helped me remember and see in my life that being patient, positive, and unworried just brings good things to life! This also goes for your interactions with others - if you hold grudges, get really jealous, or hold anger - this will only affect you in a very negative way. Release that tension! Rest, exercise, clear your mind of anger and frustration.
5. Appreciate all the good little moments, and embrace them. There are so many wonderful little things that occur in a day, even when it may not seem like it. Soak in the moments when your little one gives you a big hug when they get scared, the feeling of a hot shower at the end of the day, your sheets feeling warm and cozy while you fall asleep, give yourself a smile in the mirror after you put on your makeup in the morning, take a deep breath if you are having a hard time with the day and have a big drink of water and stretch, pick our a great new book to read at the library, smell the flowers at the garden center at the grocery store or at the park with your little one, make brownies after dinner, give yourself a pat on the back if you had a great interaction with a customer at work, appreciate the hard work you did cleaning your house, light a candle and cozy up under a blanket while you watch TV at the end of the day with your partner or yourself. These are all entirely ordinary things, but they're those little moments that can be so enjoyable. 
6. Keep an inspiration board. Whether it's a physical board where you collage photos that inspire you or do a virtual board on Pinterest, it's good to have a visual of something that inspires you. I love using Pinterest to inspire me creatively and mentally - quotes, creative ideas, mom ideas, etc. 

Hopefully this was a helpful blog post to someone out there - I love focusing on positivity and self improvement, and in some seasons of life, it can be hard. Just try to enjoy where you are right now, and focus on the silver lining. You are doing a great job!

Megan